One of the things I enjoy is talking and getting to know ppl - different culture, mindset, likes, dislikes and so forth. In a nutshell, I find the diversity of humans an intriguing subject. Fascinated by the differences. But if you ask if I like every single person I met or that has piqued my interest, then the answer is no.
But if you ask if I have ever liked anyone I was first fascinated with, then the answer will be yes. The ‘like’ category is a subset of the ‘fascinated’ category and not otherwise. (however I found out that most ppl are the opposite)
But even so, there are varying degrees of like.
Like as a friend.
Like as a sounding board.
Like as a great partner for a boozy night out.
Like as someone you foresee more developing – almost really ‘liking’ this person.
Now, not many ppl have reached the latter. Though I now realise that I am the only one that is clear of (my) definitions of the words and the context of which I am using it to understand where these ppl stand with me. And the problem is other ppl only see – ah… fascinated means she likes him. She likes him means she really ‘likes’ him.
Which is unfair right? That is so superficial. Or am I just making it complicated for myself?
Well, you may think I am justifying myself here – but I have to be clear – esp. when it is matters of the opposite sex. Even if it is getting it clear with myself.
Because I like to talk to people and I like getting to know them. And under normal circumstances, when you like to spend time talking to someone, esp. the opposite sex, it just means the radar is on. And then through the getting to know bit, your radar then zones in if this is a possible potential partner or someone to put under the friend category.
Don’t tsk tsk me ok! Half of the population do this.
The other half puts everyone in the friend category. Then fishes them out into to potential category.
No method is right, or wrong. Just that the former sometimes lands ppl in disasters. You start sending the wrong signals and the other person who is in the latter category runs in fear.
MAJOR misunderstanding…
Now for me, even though I am sometimes inclined to be the former, I am more often the latter. Because even if I did find someone fascinated, I genuinely don’t know if I like the person till it is too late.
Like for an example, I thot I liked someone, and I realised we were caught in a triangle. And by the time I was sure that I didn’t like him – but it was the fascination towards another human being, the friendship was affected (cos he found out) and no matter how hard we try, it will never get back to what it was before. Maybe he will disagree. I don’t know if he is reading, if he is, then good. Cos I NEED him to know that I miss our friendship. The way it was before. And it is shite that we can’t undo it.
Another good example is ‘fascination’ that eventually turned to ‘like’ that I didn’t realise till it was too late. By then something wedged between us and we couldn’t undo it as well. And like the first example, the friendship is lost. Only difference is, this is more gone than the first example and I am ok with it.
Yes… I am a collection of disastrous crushes, fascinations and likes.
Didn’t I tell you I am emotionally dysfunctional?
So, based on my understanding and definition, am I fascinated with someone or some people, and then the answer is yes. I have recently met a group of ppl who are totally buzzed about music. And it is nice. Only problem is they meet up at night to have a good natter. And I love my sleep.
But it is nice… meeting new ppl and broadening my circle of friends.
Do I like someone amongst that group, well I don’t know. Maybe. Maybe not.
I am not in a hurry to sieve anyone out yet. Let God decide.
Till then… I am going to let humanity and its diversity fascinate me.
PS………
Main Entry: fas•ci•nate
Pronunciation: 'fa-s&-"nAt
Function: verb
Inflected Form(s): fas•ci•nat•ed; fas•ci•nat•ing /'fas-"nA-ti[ng], 'fa-s&-"nA-/
Etymology: Latin fascinatus, past participle of fascinare, from fascinum evil spell
transitive verb
1 obsolete : BEWITCH
2 a : to transfix and hold spellbound by an irresistible power
intransitive verb : to be irresistibly attractive - the novel's flamboyant cover fascinates -
synonym see ATTRACT
Main Entry: 1like
Pronunciation: 'lIk
Function: verb
Inflected Form(s): liked; lik•ing
Etymology: Middle English, from Old English lIcian; akin to Old English gelIc alike
transitive verb
1 chiefly dialect : to be suitable or agreeable to - I like onions but they don't like me -
2 a : to feel attraction toward or take pleasure in : ENJOY
3 : to wish to have : WANT
4 : to do well in
intransitive verb
1 dialect : APPROVE
2 : to feel inclined : CHOOSE, PREFER
Definitions are made possible by Merriam-Webster Online Dictionary.
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